Beards

Beards are the most grooviest fashion accessory of our time. Beards are cool. Beards are super. Beards are super-dooper-boo-bop-a-wooba. This would be good, if it were true, but it's not because beards are sad, especially if they are colour-less and fluffy.

"My beard's dropped off" is a vaguely humorous phrase.