Penney, Stephen

One of the key members of Gopsi is Stephen Penney. He materialised, as did we all, in September 1989. Although he may speak of a distant past in an enchanted Oak forest, this is just the product of his imagination, as it is well known as nothing existed before September 1989.

Whilst being of a lesser height than the average Gopsian, Stephen also has a larger beer output than the average Gopsian. This is not to say the beer is normally vomited out (although it is fair to say that this has been known), but that beer is produced using home brewing techniques.

Like a number of Gopsians, he enjoys spending time a substantial distance above ground level. However, the reason for this is not so much to do with mountains, as to do with bells. These bodies are known to reside up the towers of churches, where they sit motionless relative to the earth until an extraneous force acts upon them. Such forces may be caused by the one they call Stephen, and often are, although they can be produced by other people too.

Stephen, when in France, and even when not in France, is sometimes known as 'Etienne Dix-centimes', after his name was translated into French. This was, as the observant linguist will recognise, a number of years ago, when the exchange rate was thus.

As a member of Gopsi, he has a strong influence on Gopsi music, himself being the actual Stephen of 'Stephen and the Prats'. He has therefore contributed greatly to the wealth of great songs produced, perhaps especially noting 'Mr Fernandez Rode a Horse', among many others.

It may one day be said that (like King Arthur) one day, when Ispog is in great need, Stephen will return to save 'his' land and people (It's not really his). However, unlike King Arthur he has not been dead for many hundreds of years (at least of the time of writing, anyway)(It may be that he is an automated corpse, showing outward appearances equating to the general appearance of life, but this is not probable). Very like King Arthur, he undoubtedly won't come back, because in general the vast majority of people don't come back from the dead, this feat being fairly difficult at the best of times.