A Sellotape holder that is actually very much alive. He has his name written on the side of him and is in care of David Edgar. There have been several 'accidental' attempts on his life, including when Stephen Temple tried to rip his name off, and when Stephen Penney decided to catapult him so hard that he split in two (Arnold, not Stephen). The Arnold Barton Society was his original fan club, which was shortly shortened to ABS and then changed to Total (ABS being a mnemonic of ABSOLUTE MAGNITUDE, of which the former word means TOTAL). Arnold Barton shall reign forever!